Fear and panic often fills my heart almost literally, and my heart fills with a strong dull pain because of the panic. I want to run. Even in my dreams, it can be so frightening because I can't move. Fear. So afraid. Panic. Heart racing. I need to get up and leave. Where do I go? Everyone can betray me and force me into this place that I fear, and the more I think of that fact the more afraid I am! WHY IS THIS WORLD SO CRUEL!? Yet...
I know the God whom I trust will not utterly forsake me. Only my older brother Jesus went all the way to Hell, and all the reasons that God has for sending me are swallowed up in His sacrafice for me. And I know that even if I must be handed over to my tormenters, I will be storing up a weight of glory that will endure for all ages and sing with unrelenting light the praise of my Father in heaven.
Father, you have not promised that I will not endure torment, but I am surrounded by a cloud of witnesses who spur me on toward faith in your goodness no matter what may come. Thank you Father that I can be comforted in all circumstances. Thank you for sending Jesus to take the torment that I deserved, and left me only with your pleasure looking ever down on me, reclining against your chest.
Psalm 27
The LORD is my light and my salvation;
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life;
of whom shall I be afraid?
When evildoers assail me
to eat up my flesh,
my adversaries and foes,
it is they who stumble and fall.
Though an army encamp against me,
my heart shall not fear;
though war arise against me,
yet I will be confident.
One thing have I asked of the LORD,
that will I seek after:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD
and to inquire in his temple.
For he will hide me in his shelter
in the day of trouble;
he will conceal me under the cover of his tent;
he will lift me high upon a rock.
And now my head shall be lifted up
above my enemies all around me,
and I will offer in his tent
sacrifices with shouts of joy;
I will sing and make melody to the LORD.
Hear, O LORD, when I cry aloud;
be gracious to me and answer me!
You have said, “Seek my face.”
My heart says to you,
“Your face, LORD, do I seek.”
Hide not your face from me.
Turn not your servant away in anger,
O you who have been my help.
Cast me not off; forsake me not,
O God of my salvation!
For my father and my mother have forsaken me,
but the LORD will take me in.
Teach me your way, O LORD,
and lead me on a level path
because of my enemies.
Give me not up to the will of my adversaries;
for false witnesses have risen against me,
and they breathe out violence.
I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living!
Wait for the LORD;
be strong, and let your heart take courage;
wait for the LORD!
I know the God whom I trust will not utterly forsake me. Only my older brother Jesus went all the way to Hell, and all the reasons that God has for sending me are swallowed up in His sacrafice for me. And I know that even if I must be handed over to my tormenters, I will be storing up a weight of glory that will endure for all ages and sing with unrelenting light the praise of my Father in heaven.
Father, you have not promised that I will not endure torment, but I am surrounded by a cloud of witnesses who spur me on toward faith in your goodness no matter what may come. Thank you Father that I can be comforted in all circumstances. Thank you for sending Jesus to take the torment that I deserved, and left me only with your pleasure looking ever down on me, reclining against your chest.
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