So God bought me beer and wings

I don't know what tomorrow will bring, but I know Who holds tomorrow.  God has not left me with any needs, and what needs I feel I have, I know that he will provide.  All of my bills have been paid up until now.  But the problem?  I want to minister to this guy I worked, to hang out with him, strengthen his faltering faith, and introduce him to my gospel-centered community, but I have no money.  Literally, I would not have a whole dollar to spend on beer and wings.  The strangest thing happened, though.  This morning, after we were done at the gym, I just said, "So you wanna grab some beer and wings this evening?"  Why did I ask that?  I have no money!  I knew, not even in the back of my mind, I mean at the forefront I knew, I just knew that God would provide the money to get beer and wings.  He did want beer and wings so we parted ways and on the drive home I was wondering, 'How in the world am I going to get money for beer and wings?'  Then I remembered, and I eagerly (even while I was driving, for shame) started logging on to the account into which my Air National Guard check gets deposited because THEY HADN'T PAID ME FOR MY LAST GUARD DRILL YET!!! :-D  And of course, that is how God bought my beer and wings.  Tonight, we dine on Garlic Parmesan wings and Hefeweizen! 
So is this what it's like to work for God?  Constantly wondering how God will provide only to be surprised at the end when he pulls through?  I know that the Father didn't pull through for Christ on the cross specifically so that he CAN pull through for us now.  I'm glad for these tangible examples of God's love for his children.  I'm actually excited to minister to my brothers and sisters, and I'm happy for God to float the bill, both literally and figuratively.  I know that he works for us, for our happiness and to his glory.
Thank you, Father for being so good for me.  I don't know what tomorrow will bring, and I know that there are innumerable ways that my enemy will try to pull me away from you and back into despair.  Indeed, I don't know what tomorrow will bring, but I know that you are the God of tomorrow, just like you have shown yourself to be the God of today.  I know that you will meet all my needs according to your riches and Glory.  Help me only to trust; help me in my disbelief.

Soli Deo Gloria

Under attack again

Why am I now feeling hopeless again?  I just spoke with Ian about it, but I can't really remember what he said.  It's so unfair.  Why can't I even remember so I can preach the Gospel to myself effectively?  Does God not care, or want me to have faith in him?  That can't be, since he sent Christ to the Cross to win my salvation at all cost to himself.  But where is my joy?  Where is my peace that passes understanding?  Why do I not care when I'm told about Jesus, who at all cost to himself paid for the sins that have brought me so low?  It is not RIGHT for me to not care!  I have no joy in the generosity of others, even of a God who has taken me in as his own.  My head aches as I beg God to help me to rest in him.  My prayers are so filled with stress that I'm afraid I'm going to sweat blood. God, if you don't save me, then I'm lost!  I need you to serve me so I can be grateful.  I need you to bring me a job so I can provide and give generously.  I need you to remind me of these things, and I need your mercy to be new in the morning.  I want to be swept up in your mission, and I want you to be the one glorified for it.  Give me this grace, Father, and I will glorify your name.  You do all the work; I do all the receiving.  I get all the benefits; you get all the glory.  Just as it should be, my Father.